Children grow and develop in different ways. However, the way a child grows up depends on the upbringing they receive both from the parent and the entire society in general. The type of parenting can play a crucial role in determining whether the child will grow to be attached to the parent or will fear being close to them. In most cases, children develop a strong bond with the people whom they have grown knowing, and especially those who have been nice to them. Based on the example, a young child, therefore, will always tend to be closer to his mother since from there, they are assured of protection, and also, they know that it is the parent who is responsible for feeding them, and this relationship continues to strengthen the bond between the parent and child. There are various theories that can be used to explain the reason why children behave in a certain manner as they progress through the stages of human development and, more so, in relation to the children’s attachment with their parents. Some of these theories include Bowlby’s attachment theory and behavioral child development theories by Watson and Skinner.
Behavioral child development theories were developed in the first half of the 20th century. The behaviorists believed that psychology was required to emphasize the observable as well as the quantifiable behaviors so that it could become a more scientific discipline. Based on the behaviorists’ perspective, all human behavior can be explained in regard to the environmental influences, and this explains why behaviorists such as Watson and Skinner emphasized that learning does occur purely through processes of association and reinforcement. Based on this concept, the behaviorist child development theories tend to emphasize how the interactions with the environment influence the behavior of the child. Watson and Skinner deal with the observable behaviors, and to them, development is termed as a reaction to rewards, punishment, reinforcement, and stimuli.
Based on Watson and Skinner’s perception of development in children, two major types of learning were developed, and they include classical conditioning and operant conditioning. Classical conditioning involves child learning through pairing a naturally occurring stimulus with a previously neutral stimulus. Based on classical conditioning, a child will always try to get closer to the mother, and this is because they benefit more from the mother than from the strangers. For example, it is from the mother that they obtain food as the mother breastfeeds the child. With food being the primary factor of motivation, the child tends to pair the parent to be of more benefit. Besides, there are other advantages that the child attributes the mother with; for example, love and affection can only be obtained from that person from whom a strong bond has been developed. Based on this, the child strongly learns to pair the mother with strangers, perceiving the mother as being more beneficial.
On the other hand, operant conditioning involves utilizing reinforcements and punishment to help in modifying behavior. A child observes and learns from the environment, learning the characters of every person around them. Based on this, they are able to differentiate between a good person and a bad person. There are people who are naturally harsh to children, and as a retaliatory mechanism, children often cry whenever such people are close to them. If the mother is close, they may often run for safety, and this explains why a child may be more inclined to their mother than to strangers. Strangers may be hostile and unpredictable, unlike the mother who has helped the child since birth, and based on this, the child has learned to trust the mother than anyone else.
Finally, Bowlby’s attachment theory can also be used to explain why a small child may always be inclined to be a closet to his or her mother. According to John Bowlby, early relationships with the caregivers play a crucial role in the development of a child and also continues to influence the social relationships throughout the life of a child. The attachment theory suggests that children are born with an innate need to form attachments that are essential in helping the child to survive as they help the child is receiving care and protection. Also, these developed attachments are characterized by clear behavioral and motivational patterns. Based on this, children, along with their mothers or care provider, do engage in behaviors that are designed to ensure proximity. As a result, children strive to stay close and connected with their mothers, who will, in turn, help the child by providing a safe haven and a secure base essential to help the child in the exploration of the new world.
Children benefit much from their mothers, and this explains why they always want to stay close to them as they fear losing what they have been gaining. For example, children who have consistently received support and care are more likely to develop a strong and secure attachment with their mothers, while those who receive less reliable care may develop an ambivalent, avoidant, and disorganized behavior towards then parents or mothers. Based on this, it is evident that parenting style tends to affect the immediate environment that the child is brought up in, and this determines whether a stronger bond will be built between the mother and the child. If the environment is hostile, it is more likely that the child will develop avoidance.